How do I know if Mediation is right for me?
Common reasons why people THINK they might not be good candidates for divorce mediation as opposed to litigation…
HIGH CONFLICT
If the couple is experiencing extreme levels of conflict, hostility, or emotional volatility. Wrong! In mediation, we will work with you to find understanding about what is behind your conflict and volatility. We will help you separate positions from interests, and guide you in the generative process of finding ways to get your needs met that you may not have considered before.
POWER IMBALANCE
In cases where there's a significant power imbalance between the spouses, such as situations involving domestic abuse, intimidation, or control. Wrong! In mediation, if there is intimate partner violence, we get you the services you need so that you can safely participate.
COMPLEX FINANCIAL ISSUES
If the couple has intricate financial matters, such as extensive investments, multiple properties, or complex business interests. Wrong! We understand complex finances. Whether it is a WRS plan, Epic stock, disability, federal or state benefits, stock options, small or large businesses, we’ve seen it all. If there is anything that our CDFA’s aren’t familiar with, we will do the research to understand what you have.
LEGAL, FINANCIAL OR EMOTIONAL UNPREPAREDNESS
If one or both spouses are unaware of their legal rights and responsibilities or are not emotionally ready to navigate the divorce process. Wrong! Very few people indeed know anything about the legal or financial intricacies of divorce, or how it is all going to feel. It is our job to educate you about these things. We have done hundreds of divorces. We can prepare you for yours!
SUBSTANCE ABUSE OR MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES
If either spouse is dealing with serious substance abuse or mental health issues that impede their ability to participate effectively. Wrong! If you or your spouse are struggling with substance abuse or mental health issues during divorce, you need support and help. We can refer you to the right place. We will work with both of you to develop a realistic plan regarding placement that will protect the safety of your children and promote a healthy relationship with both of you.
REAL reasons why people would not be a good candidate for mediation…
UNWILLINGNESS TO COOPERATE
If one or both spouses are not genuinely interested in finding common ground or are unwilling to compromise. True! Mediation requires true compromise from both of you. It is important to understand that you are not going to get everything you want. It is important to understand that you cannot draw lines in the sand and refuse to discuss, consider, or compromise. That just won’t work.
LACK OF FULL DISCLOSURE
If there's a lack of transparency or a history of deceit. True! Mediation is based on both parties honestly reporting their financials. While we do sometimes review financial records, we do not do formal discovery. At your final hearing, you will be attesting to complete disclosure. Lying about that is a serious business. If you are not prepared to fully disclose ALL your assets and debts, mediation is not for you.
>> Learn More About the Advantages of Divorce Mediation